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Epoch Glide - Virtual Grape Gardens

Epoch Glide

A Shameless Chrono Trigger Parody
Kirbynite
The Jarl of Neo Grape Gardens




Kirby quietly giggled.

Kirby: The two of you are quite the characters.
Ralzma
Beatrix glared over at Kirby.

Beatrix: "Says the prince! Look at you, you're like some... perverted cross dresser!
Kirbynite
The Jarl of Neo Grape Gardens




Kirby: Huh?

He began looking at his clothes.

Kirby: Is this not normal attire for your class? My intention was not to unusual clothes for my gender.
Tyty
Can you not understand the words that are commin' outta my mouth?
Teyla: I think She means that you dressed up like the queen....
Kirbynite
The Jarl of Neo Grape Gardens




Kirby: .. Oh! But.. that was not my choice!

He paused.

Kirby: Though, I suppose one could say that me stepping onto that machine may have been my fault..
Ralzma
Beatrix: "It's completely your fault!"
Kirbynite
The Jarl of Neo Grape Gardens




Kirby pouted as he started to walk forward.

Kirby: We should be returning to our home time.

He continued to walk until he paused once more.

Kirby: I.. I do not know in what direction we should walk to.
Ralzma
Beatrix turned to look about before going off in the direction she originally remembered coming from.

Beatrix: "I'm sure if I'm going the wrong way, Teyla will point us in the right direction, right?"
Kirbynite
The Jarl of Neo Grape Gardens




Kirby nervously glanced at Teyla
Tyty
Can you not understand the words that are commin' outta my mouth?
Teyla: Left. Not right.

She waved a high-tech looking device, that beeped as she waved it in another direction.
Kirbynite
The Jarl of Neo Grape Gardens




Sure enough, Teyla's directions were correct. After an undetermined amount of time, the trio finally arrived at the eastern Guardia forest.

Kirby: It is amazing to think that this area here will, one day, become a safe area to hold large gatherings.

He nervously looked around as he subconciously wringed his hands.

Kirby: W-what are we looking for? D-do you think we will be quick enough before we attract the attention of a band of Fiends..?
Tyty
Can you not understand the words that are commin' outta my mouth?
Teyla: See that glowing tiny circle there with the electricity around it? That's what we're looking for.

She grinned.

Teyla: A rift in space-time.
Kirbynite
The Jarl of Neo Grape Gardens




Kirby gasped.

Kirby: It is simply just.. there? How has our forefathers not noticed this?
Ralzma
Beatrix: "I'm going to guess it's only present to time travelers or something."
Tyty
Can you not understand the words that are commin' outta my mouth?
Teyla: Well, yes. We sorta... created it.

She looked at Kirby, and adjusted her goggles as she began pushing some buttons on the glove on her arm.

Teyla: The pendant you had has intense mystical properties, that when paired with my teleporter created a rift in time... and technically space, but you guys probably don't understand multiverse theory...

Blah blah chest open in past = no chest in future, chest open in future = chest still there in past.

Teyla: Anyways, I created a tool that will allow us to open these rifts, or miniature wormholes, to a travel-able size. Now we have to be careful with this tool, because anyone who gets their hands on it can also see and access these rifts.

She pulled out what appeared to be a wrench with some strange gizmos attached from her belt.

Teyla: I call it the time-manipulator Overdrive version 0.345... Or T-manip for short. It has 17 different modes.
Kirbynite
The Jarl of Neo Grape Gardens




Kirby: A.. Amazing.

He looked at Teyla with a gaping mouth.

Kirby: I would gladly trade my heritage for your intellect!

He slowly approached the rift.

Kirby: So.. How does this work? Do we simply.. jump in?
Ralzma
Beatrix stared at Teyla.

Beatrix: "Seventeen!? Does it have a back massager mode with all of those?"
Tyty
Can you not understand the words that are commin' outta my mouth?
Teyla: That's mode 9.

She grinned proudly.

Teyla: You can try jumping in, but the hole as it is is much too small. It's really risky, so I wouldn't. How do we make it bigger?...

She pointed her device at it, and pressed a button.

Teyla: By activating mode 7 on the T-manip!

A flashy, warbly effect happened, and the hole grew much bigger. Wow. Mode 7.
Kirbynite
The Jarl of Neo Grape Gardens




So trippy. Much layers. Wow.

Kirby: That is incredible!

He looked back at the time rift and nervously bit his lip.

Kirby: I am suddenly feeling a combination of anxiety and intimidation..
Ralzma
Beatrix: "Intimidation? Hah! Don't be intimidated! I'm here with you!"

She grabbed Kirby by the arm, nodded toward Teyla to grab his other arm, and prepared to jump in.
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